


A Kick In The Pants

by decadent_mousse



Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Chubby!Newt, Embarrassment, Humor, M/M, Newt in Hermann's Parka, Situational Humiliation, Tight Pants, Unresolved Sexual Tension, ripped pants, too tight pants
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-25
Updated: 2015-12-25
Packaged: 2018-05-09 08:49:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,049
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5533649
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/decadent_mousse/pseuds/decadent_mousse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was honestly only a matter of time before Newt got defeated by a pair of tight pants.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Kick In The Pants

**Author's Note:**

  * For [3ggnoth3r3](https://archiveofourown.org/users/3ggnoth3r3/gifts).



> This is my gift to [lunarinferno](http://archiveofourown.org/users/lunarinferno/pseuds/lunarinferno) for the [PacRim Holiday Swap](http://pacrimholidayswap.tumblr.com/)! She wanted something with chubby embarrassed Newt, and I did my best to deliver! I hope you like it! <3

Newt had lost a lot of weight over the years because of food rationing and okay, he knew -- he knew it was important, that there was a food shortage, yada yada yada.  Important or not, that didn't change the fact that he hadn't seen an actual genuine pop-tart in five years or that he'd kill to eat some actual freshly cooked food and not reconstituted muck that only vaguely resembled something that might, at one point in the  _ very _  distant past, have been chicken.

So could anyone blame him, really, if he went a little overboard when he came to Hong Kong?  Suddenly _food_.  Real food. 

He didn’t really think about the possible consequences much until the day he got his jeans halfway up his thighs before he realized he had a serious problem.  

"Uh oh."

He tugged harder, and slowly the jeans grudgingly creeped up his thighs... and stopped again.

"Shit."

He pulled and strained and hopped, then the room tilted sideways.  He hollered as he went down.  Fortunately for him the bed had been there to break his fall and he bounced, unharmed and (relatively) undefeated. He was going to get these fucking pants on.  He rolled around wildly, mattress squeaking plaintively beneath him, trying to get in a position with good enough leverage to pull the pants up.  Progress was slow and he was sweating a little -- okay, a lot -- by the time he actually got them on, but he  _ did _  get them on.  He was a fucking rock star.  

He stared up at the ceiling, panting, and wondered how long it would take for a couple new pairs of pants to reach him if he ordered online.  If he could manage to have them delivered stealthily -- because he did  _ not _  want anyone to know that Dr. Newton Geiszler had been taken down by a tight pair of jeans.  He’d never live it down.

Until then, he was just going have to deal with the pants he had now.  

He tried to sit up, but that didn’t work out too well.  What he actually ended up doing was a series of impromptu crunches -- or at least that’s what it felt like to his entire midsection.  Was he seriously not going to be able to bend?  All day long?  He groaned and rolled to the side, and kept rolling until he reached the end of the bed and -- with a series of acrobatic maneuvers he was actually pretty proud of pulling off -- managed to stumble to his feet instead of falling to the floor.  

This was okay.  This was fine.  He did most of his work standing up, anyway, so it wouldn’t be that big of a deal if he couldn’t sit down.  If he had to, he could come back to his room on his lunch break to sprawl out on his bed for awhile to give himself a rest.  It wasn’t  _ ideal _  but he could make this work.

...Now he had to figure out how he was going to get his shoes on.

~

It was becoming clearer by the hour that this was not going to work.

He could barely move.  All morning long, every time he had to walk across his work area, he could  _ feel _  his pants pulling and squeezing everything from the stomach down -- and not in a good way.  It was actually starting to hurt a little around the hem of his jeans, where things were tightest.  It might’ve just been his imagination, but he was beginning to think he was losing feeling in his feet.  

It got more and more distracting as the day wore on, so it wasn’t exactly a surprise when he ended up bumping his tray and sending several scalpels skittering across the floor.  

“What on earth are you doing over there?” Hermann grumbled, just loud enough for him to hear.

“ _ Working _ , Hermann,” he retorted as he bent over to pick one of them up.  “Why don’t you pay more attention to your little board there, and less on--”  There was a loud ripping noise, and he froze.  He hoped to God that Hermann hadn’t heard it.

"What was that?"

No such luck.

He bolted upward, blood rushing to his face.  "Uh, what was what?"

Hermann squinted at him, and his heart began to pound.

"You didn't hear that?"

"I'm not sure which 'that' you're talking about.  There's a lot of little noises in here, man.  That kaiju sample making bubbles, that computer's hard drive slowly dying over there, that--"

Hermann sighed loudly.  "No, it was a sort of... tearing noise."

"I ripped up a paper a minute ago?   'Dr. Geiszler, we have been notified of complaints by your lab partner,' something something.  Probably not anything important." 

He didn't look like he was buying it, but he must've decided it wasn't worth the hassle, because he turned back to his equations.

Newt let out a soft sigh of relief while simultaneously rolling his eyes up to the ceiling because _really_?  His pants had held out this long and they couldn't have gone another week until his new pants came?

Okay, so it was bad, but it wasn’t the end of the world.  He was going to be fine.  He just had to keep working, while making sure to keep his ass out of Hermann’s line of sight.  He could wait until the evening lull in Shatterdome activity and run back to his room -- or speed-walk, he was pretty sure the pants would just disintegrate completely if he tried running in them -- and hopefully nobody would be around to witness his speed-walk of shame.  It would be fine.

~

Except, two hours later, Hermann walked over to his side of the lab and looked at him expectantly.  

“What?” Newt asked, hoping he’d mistake his nervousness for annoyance and just leave him alone.

“It’s time for a lunch break, I think.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“Really,” Hermann replied, sounding completely unconvinced.  Newt could  _ feel _  the scrutiny.

His ass clenched, a little bit, like it thought if it tried hard enough it could shrink away and disappear and Hermann wouldn't notice the huge _hole_ in his jeans.  He hadn't had a chance to take a look at it yet, but if the breeze across his butt was any indication, it had to be a pretty huge tear.

"Are you feeling alright?"

"Y-yeah, I'm great.  I'm awesome.  Why?"

Hermann was still staring at him like he stared at equations he was trying to figure out.  "Because I've never known you to turn down a meal, let alone when you've gone all day without one."

He came around Newt's examination table, and when he did Newt scrambled around ninety degrees to keep his ass-end hidden from view.  If his behavior before had been suspicious, _this_ probably set off a million red flags.

"Explain yourself."

"Uh.  I don't know what you mean!"

"You are hiding something," Hermann replied slowly, "and I want to know what it is."

Shit.  He was backed into a corner.  There was no way he could flee without Hermann _seeing_ , and Hermann wasn't going to leave it alone.

He swallowed.  "Okay, I'll-- I'll show you, but if you laugh at me I'm never talking to you again, dude.  I'm serious."

Hermann looked genuinely concerned, and Newt appreciated that -- really, he did -- but this was such a clusterfuck.

"You have my word."

Newt closed his eyes and turned around slowly.  

There was a long moment of silence, and then:

"Did you sincerely think I was going to make fun of you for this?"

He squirmed uncomfortably.  "Maybe?  I dunno, Hermann, I don't make a habit of announcing when I split my pants open, okay?  Sue me!"

Hermann gave him one of those long-suffering sighs and said.  "Do you have any other pants?"

"None that aren't just as tight, unless you count my pjs.  I ordered some, but they're gonna take awhile to get here."

"It wouldn't be the first time you've come to the lab in your bed wear.  Or less."

The thing with the underwear had happened one time.   _One_ time.  

“Okay, solid plan.  Except for one problem.”

“Which is?”

Newt groaned.  "How am I gonna get back to my room without anyone seeing me?”

There were people coming and going throughout the halls of the Shatterdome all day, twenty-four/seven.  He might have stood half a chance during a shift change or something, but right now?  Within the hour he'd be That K-Sci Guy Who Exploded Out Of His Pants.  He got teased enough already as it was.

"I may have an idea," Hermann said.  

"I'm not duct-taping my ass."

The mathematician rolled his eyes and walked over to his side of the lab, tugging his parka off of the chair he'd had it draped over.  Newt followed.

"Your parka?  Hermann, if I wear that, people are gonna talk."

"It'll conceal your backside and considering we're having a rather chilly December, I doubt anyone will question it too much.  Besides, they already talk."

"Wait-- they do?!"

“Yes.”

He wanted -- he  _ needed _  -- to know what was being said.  He didn’t give much of a shit what people said about him, personally, behind his back, but it was a whole different ball of wax if people were dragging Hermann into it.  

“Well… what do they say?”

“There seems to be a betting pool in place,” Hermann replied, “to determine when we are finally going to -- what was the word they used -- ‘bone.’”

“Oh my god.  Who-- wh-- they?”

“A couple of techs in the jaeger bay.  I suspect they didn’t realize how well their voices carried across a room with a ceiling that high.”

He seemed way too cool and calm about this.  He was so matter of fact about it.  

“This doesn’t  _ bother _  you?!”

“Not particularly,” he sniffed.  “Why?  Does it… bother you?”

“Not really.”  Newt grinned and leaned across Hermann’s desk.  The hole in his pants pulled and he was pretty sure it tore open wider, but at this point what did he have to lose?  He wiggled his eyebrows.  “ _ Do  _ you want to bone?”

Hermann scoffed and gave him an offended look.  “I could file a complaint for sexual harassment.”

“That’s not a no.”

He smirked.  “No, it isn’t.”

Well, that was… interesting.  Something to think about later, maybe, when his ass wasn’t trying to spilling out the back of his jeans.

Hermann slung his parka at his chest, and the moment was gone.  “I’ll be expecting this back.”

“Yeah, sure.”

“ _ Immediately _  after you are through using it.”

“Okay, dude,  _ geez _ .”

It wasn’t like he was going to try to steal Hermann’s parka -- he knew it was his favorite jacket.  If it was anything below 10 C and there was a slightest whiff of a breeze outside, Hermann was in that thing.  He’d never separate them for long if he could help it.  

...Even though it was the warmest thing he had ever slipped onto his body, wow.  He’d never worn it before now, and it felt like a weird kind of honor to be allowed to, like being allowed to borrow it meant he was deep in the Hermann Gottlieb circle of trust.  It was well-insulated and cozy -- he could see why Hermann liked it so much.  It was oversized for Hermann, so Newt practically drowned in it, but he could make it work.  People might side-eye him a little for wearing it in the halls, but it was better than them seeing his ass peeking out of his pants.

“Thanks, Hermann.”

Hermann waved at him dismissively.  Was he… blushing?  “Just go, will you?”

“Don’t have to tell me twice, man.”

Newt spun around and made a beeline for the door, and that’s when he heard Hermann’s voice again.

"And Newton?"

He stopped and turned around.  "Yeah?"

Hermann stared pointedly at some spot beyond Newt's shoulder, face unreadable.  "In the future, you may want to consider wearing underwear."

"Probably," Newt replied, nodding slowly and screaming internally.  

"If not for modesty's sake, than for insulation at least."

With his pants torn open there was a pretty wicked draft, it was true.

  
He wondered if Pentecost would take a transfer request seriously if he explained how horrifying accidentally mooning his lab partner was on a scale of one to ten.


End file.
